Crashing cars and crushing hearts

With last week's premiere behind them, the contestants finally get to go to sleep and now the real fun begins (for us... not so much for them...).

The episode started off fast and furious with Arie pulling up on a motorcycle to have the season's first one-on-one with Becca K.  I don't remember Becca at all from the first episode.  I bet, when walking into the house, Arie wasn't even sure which girl she was.

The first part of the date is Rachel Zoe acting as a personal stylist for Becca.  Rachel Zoe is super cool but looked like she wanted to die.  Speaking of... I would die if this was my first date with a guy. How uncomfortable would it be to try on clothes for someone you just started dating?!  Trying on clothes is already the worst but having a guy you like sit there and see you in each one would be horrible.  There was not a moment of quality time spent between them.  Why was she being showered with expensive clothes/shoes/jewelry?  Becca and Arie only got to spend time together after she was completely high on dopamine and blinded by Loubouton studs.  (Full disclosure:  I had to google "red sole shoes" to be sure they were Loubouton's and find out how to actually spell "Loubouton").

Despite a weird date concept, Becca and Arie had a really natural connection.  The worst part about being the first one-on-one is having to see all of the dates to come and deal with playing second fiddle for a while.  Becca seems to have a confidence and maturity that a lot of the ladies don't.  Hearing her speak about her dad's illness and death gave us a glimpse at how open her heart is and where her values lie.

Look... for my own Bachelor-viewing sanity, Bibiana needs to stick around.  I know she won't win.  It's against all The Bachelor rules.  She does, however, play an incredibly important role.  She's the girl that gives hilarious commentary in her interviews.  She's who we all want as a drinking buddy.  I want her to come to my workplace Christmas party and walk around judging everyone.  Next time my department is hiring, I am going to look her up.  My friend, Andrea, hit the nail on the head when she referred to Bibiana as the "Carly W." of this season. Bibiana is a shoe-in for all of The Bachelor/ette spin-offs like Bachelor in Paradise. 





I wasn't surprised to see Krystal get the second one-on-one date of the night.  She is one of those people who makes a really memorable first impression.  She certainly has an intensity about her that draws you in.  I don't think we've seen an authentic and vulnerable side of Krystal yet. 



Did anyone else notice that Krystal and Arie's mom look alike?!  I lied about the personal stylist date...  meeting my boyfriend's parents on a first date is actually my nightmare.  What was Arie thinking?!  Thar is not only so much pressure for Krystal but the other girls are going to die when they find out.  It's social suicide to send her back into the house after this.


My gut feeling is that Krystal puts so much time into helping others in an attempt to cover up some of her own pain and past experiences.  She has had a rough life for sure but I worry that she hasn't had help and support for herself before pouring all of that energy into others.  This process will be really difficult for Krystal and her insecurities are going to bubble up as Arie spends time with other girls.




The Bachelor has an unrivaled ability to come up with the worst group date ideas.  Let's throw fifteen catty girls into an environment more competitive than merely vying for the love of the same guy.  Take all of that and then asking them to crash into each other in motor vehicles during a demolition derby? 





...  I wasn't going to bring it up but...   *sigh*   Ok... last week, Annaliese was one of my absolute favourite ladies.  I pegged her as going all the way.  We got a small glimpse into, what I hope is a rare moment, of Annaliese's PBCSD (Post Bumper Car Stress Disorder).  To be really fair,  I don't understand how a real like demolition derby with complete amateur drivers is safe.  I would have made up a fake story and popped out some tears to avoid intentional car crashes too.  The only good that could come from this date is finding out who the completely crazy and ruthless girls are (ehem...  Brittany T...).  Those are the locos who will key your car and slash your tires at the first opportunity.

I want to like Sienne.  Being a Yale grad, she is clearly super smart.  She happens to be stunningly beautiful which doesn't hurt.  For both of those reasons and more, she and Arie are a mismatch to say the least.  I wish Sienne would open up more during her limited time with Arie instead of listing off all of her life accomplishments.  I'm surprised that Arie gave her the date rose but delighted that he didn't give it to Chelsea.






Does Bekah makes anyone else incredibly nervous?!  I struggle to put my finger on exactly what makes me so uncomfortable.  She doesn't strike me as disingenuous but she's a lot...  Like... a lot a lot.  Arie is obviously intrigued by her boldness and confidence but does she have the ability to tone it down?  What is she like at home on a Sunday afternoon?  I've been reading lots of speculation that Becca has the same appeal to Arie that Courtney Robinson had.  Courtney was one of the most controversial gals to ever grace The Bachelor (which is saying something).  Although Bekah seems like a nicer and more social contestant than Courtney was, they both have a similar level of intensity and mystique.  They also may or may not have practically the same face... 


At this point in "the game", the pre-rose ceremony cocktail hours are so charged and intense but the girls going home are typically those who have had no on-air time.  No one is emotionally invested but the girls are typically exhausted, under-fed and over-served.  This leads to the best exit interviews of all time.  This week, the Best Exit award easily went to Jenna who told Arie she wasn't crying because she was upset about leaving him.  She was upset about leaving her friends.  Yes!!

I have a feeling Arie is going to do what has to be done this season.  I can't see him keeping girls around just for the sake of it.  He has the benefit of being a past contestant but also having years of distance between being on the show and coming back. I wasn't initially excited about this season, but Arie is growing on me and I'm definitely hooked early.  Looking forward to watching along with you all!  Please leave your thoughts and predictions below and follow along @midtowndiaries on Instagram. 

Arie's back and so am I!

After an 18 month hiatus, I am officially back in Midtown.  In the past year and a half, I have experienced the most dramatic life season yet after welcoming my very own baby bachelor in April.  Several months have passed and I can finally stay up until 10pm (sometimes...).  This means I'm fully renewing my Bachelor Nation membership.

I won't lie to you.  I was less than excited to hear that Arie was this season's Bachelor.  Emily's season, in 2012, was one of my favorites but I was #teamJef all the way.  Arie and Emily would have never worked out although I'm convinced Sean and Emily would still be together if he had won.  But then there would be no Sean and Catherine and therefore no Samuel and no baby-on-the-way and fewer super annoying paid Instagram ads on my feed each day.  I have to assume that viewership is down and producers are trying to get back their uber-loyal Emily-era fans.  You win this round, ABC.

For those of you who didn't see Emily's season, this hilarious recap will tell you everything you need to know.  Wait...  I just found this photo...  was he dating Courtney?  Please say "no".

I will give Arie the benefit of the doubt and assume there will be a (shirtless) montage about how much he has grown and matured in the past five years.  My other prediction is that he's a total ego-maniac playboy and the contestants will collectively shed enough tears throughout the season to hose down a driveway.

There are 29 contestants this year and seemingly the most racial diverse group we've seen on The Bachelor.  I refused to watch Nick's season and missed Rachel's season due to a certain pesky 3 week old taking over my life and home.  From what I now know of her, I hope that Rachel paved the way for more girls who don't fit the historical Bachelor/ette mold. 

But enough with the pleasantries.  Let's get straight to judging a bunch of vulnerable women who are about to get their hearts ripped out on national television.

Here are the gals who made big impressions on me during the premiere:

Chelsea.  *sigh*  Do I have to? 

Will we all really have to deal with another girl like Chelsea?  She's already showing her Mean Girl colors and proving that she's not here to make friends.  She reminds me of Courtney from Ben F's season with a bit of Olivia from Ben H's season.  With Arie, she's playing the mysterious/sexy card but it's coming off as distant and cold.  She needs to be careful as some of the other girls will open up in a much more authentic way.  Girls who are this assertive so early are clearly acting out of fear and insecurity.  I almost punched the TV when Arie gave her that friggin' first impression rose.  She's nasty, everyone will hate her, she'll be around for weeks, she won't win and she'll never be the Bachelorette.  In the mean time, we'll all love to hate her and the casting team will all get raises.  Ew.





Caroline.  My instincts tell me she is too successful and too much of an alpha for Arie.  She also has horrible judgement.  How can you wear a white gown on the first night when you know that it will get dragged across the wet driveway when you get out of the limo?  Rookie move, Caroline.  Rookie move.










Maquel.  She initially reminds me of Lauren Bushnell (the winner of Ben H's season).  They have a bit of a similar vibe.  She made a massive first impression by entering in a race car.  She's only 23 but will go far. 










Nysha.  Although she didn't make much of an impression on me or Ben (she was sent home without a rose), the poor girl never had a chance.  She's a nurse and, everyone knows, girls in health care professions be crazy on this show. 





Tia.  Despite being from a town called Weiner and being the good friend of former contestant. Raven (Nick's season), Tia is one of my Final 3 predictions.  She has a great sense of humour and Arie seems so relaxed during their time together.  She should never wear a color other than emerald green as she was so gorgeous in her gown.


Kendall.  During her "meet the women" video, red flags were going off all over the place.  Her love of taxidermy combined with a song on ukulele about said love of taxidermy made me nervous,  I thought she was too free-spirited and confident for Arie and had serious Crazy potential.  I saw images of Ashley from Chris Soule's season.  Wasn't she convinced that aliens were going to come down and probe her?  By the end of the episode, my opinion of her really changed.  She seems much more down-to-earth than we were led to believe and she has a really authentic charm.  I hope we get to see more of Kendall in weeks to come.  Do I think she's a great fit for Arie?  No.  But I think she will make some great commentary about the crazies in one-on-one interviews. 

Bekah.  I'm confused by my own feelings for Bekah.  She's certainly buzz-worthy and stands out from all of the other girls.  The girl is playing with a wide open heart and it's inevitable that she will be completely crushed at the end of her "journey" with Arie.  Despite being a long lost Hepburn and an incredibly old soul, Bekah's age and vulnerability will be the nail in her Bachelor coffin.  She will probably also drive the other women crazy and, at some point, sneak out to find Arie and make out in the ocean.  The next day, she will see Arie making out with someone else and be found crying in the bathroom.  You heard it here first...



Marikh.  This girl is going to be trouble!  Despite being strikingly beautiful and a real go-getter, Marikh will prove to be too much for Arie (and the other girls).  I predict she will be group date material with some one-on-one time thrown in here and there but won't be in the top 10.







Krystal.  She certainly makes a strong impression.  My concern is for her heart.  This girl is as open and willing as they come.  She will fall fast and hard and leave completely heartbroken.  The other contestants will be intimidated by her confidence and she will struggle to fit in. 








Jenna.  "That" drunk girl of the season.  She will drink too much during group dates and completely botch her time with Arie.  There will be sloppy kissing followed by giggling and smeared eye makeup.  To be fair, it did look like her one-on-one time with Arie on night one was at about 4am.  She was all over the place.








Ali. I am still completely flabbergasted that Ali was sent packing without a rose on night one.  I actually had to go online and double check that she was, in fact, passed by at the rose ceremony.  I would have pegged her as a shoe-in for at least top 5.  Her time with Arie was minimal during the cocktail hour but she is a textbook "give her a rose anyway" type of girl.





Annaliese.  Not many girls could pull off the whole kissing bandit costume idea and a) not get completely ripped apart by the other contestants and b) prove to be seemingly normal and lovely after removing the mask.  Do you remember Ashley's season when Jeff didn't remove his mask for several days?  I'm already putting money on Annaliese being in the Final 3 and/or being the next Bachelorette.

At least half of the reason I watch The Bachelor/ette is to spend time with Chris Harrison.  He's the best.  I've said it before and I'll say it many many more times.  He. is. the. best.

Look guys, Arie is 36 so let's just get in there and send the early-20-somethings home to their social media management jobs.  Don't talk about Emily's season, don't make anymore wiener jokes and no more references to "closing the deal" (real estate" or "getting to the finish line" (racing).  Just stop.

I'm looking forward to seeing where this season takes us.  Please follow along and leave your comments/predictions below.  

(the morning) After the Final Rose

Do you ever wake up in the morning with a sense that all is right and just in this world?  Today, I did.  Despite sitting here in front of my computer screen for a good ten minutes, I cannot come up with one mean thing to say about last night's finale of The Bachelor.  All of the things I wished would happen did and everyone went on to live their lives happily ever after.  The end.

Now hindsight is 20/20 and, believe you me, I was faaaaa-reaking out during the entire finale episode.  I was so sure how all of this would end but watching Ben and the girls live through the decision making process was so stressful.  At one point, two of my girlfriends and I were just sending each other selfies of our scared faces.  One of us may or may not have been crying through the whole episode... I blame hormones.

Ben's opening monologue was the ultimate "What have I done?!" realization.  Now he's worried he'll make a mistake and propose to the wrong girl?!  ...  uhhhhh...  You know you told both of them you're in love and there's an entire camera crew with you and both girls will see this right!?  There's no undoing that.  It is literally archived for the rest of time.  At that point, he was in for a world of hurt regardless of who he ended up with.



How much do we love Ben's parents?!  They are so wonderful.  They have a gentle nature but aren't shy about expressing concerns while respecting that this is Ben's decision.  And check out Ben's dad's full head of hair!  That's a great sign of things to come for future generations.

Mom was not buying this "in love with two girls" thing.  That being said, both parents seemed very open to getting to know the ladies and gave Lauren and JoJo each a really fair shot.


Lauren is certainly the more polished and composed of the two women.  Her chat with Ben's Mom impressed me.  It is not easy for most to go to their future mother-in-law for relationship advice.  She earned some serious points with me when she asked Mom about how she could help Ben through hard times.  If I had a family member going as The Bachelor/ette or a contestant, I would be so concerned that the couple only gets to see the best in each other.  Their relationships have been so short and the experience is intensified by outlandish dates, a production crew and the nature of competition.  Being in a marriage or any kind of long term relationship is really hard work and learning how to get through the tough stuff is the most challenging, although rewarding, part.

When JoJo arrived at the Higgins' little vacation home, she handed Ben's mom an awkward little bouquet in a conch shell.  "Let me just put these flowers next to the massive bouquet Lauren brought for us..."  JoJo is a really nice girl and undoubtedly head over heels for Ben.  The main factor for me swaying toward Lauren is that JoJo seems to be more wrapped up in the glamour of love.  She talks about being with Ben like it's a fairy tale and this is her perfect love story.  Lauren comes across as more of a giver and JoJo is all about how Ben makes her feel and what he gives to her.

After JoJo's visit, I really felt for Ben's poor poor mom.  It took everything in her not to reach across the couch and shake him.  She was trying so hard to keep it together and let Ben be a big boy and make his own decisions but I mean... she burst out laughing when Lauren said that Ben seems perfect...  She knows Ben better than anyone and she remained so open and positive.  You could just tell in her interview after the visits that she was really hurting for Ben.

I'm never mad at Chris Harrison but it was really annoying that, right before every commercial break, he tried to make it seem like Ben was going to get married right then and there on After the Final Rose.  Ben's hometown pastor was really into that Bible...



Has anyone noticed that JoJo's parents could play Dr. Phil and his wife Robin on SNL?  Twitter was going crazy with speculation when Lauren's entire family was shown but only JoJo's parents- no brothers.  Personally, I assumed that it was really meaningful for Ben to have them as groomsmen since they hit it off so well at hometowns...  not.  Ben never wants to see those dudes again





As Ben tried to make up his mind as to who to propose to, one of his arguments for JoJo was that they had gone through really hard things together and withstood true relationship tests.  Ummm...  no- you really haven't.  The most serious hardship they had to face was knowing what to do after a table fell over when a helicopter, which was there to fly them around Vegas, landed too close to them on a rooftop.  That is not a hardship...

If I was Lauren during her last one-on-one date, I'd be panicking BIG time.  Ben was so off and giving her nothing.  He kissed her on the forehead about twenty times which is sweet if you're sitting around watching TV but not when you're a day away from getting either proposed to or dumped.  When a guy starts a sentence by saying "No matter what happens...", it's a terrible terrible sign.

At this point in the episode, I was stress eating popcorn by the handful.  I literally had more than ten pieces of it sitting in my tank top when I went to change for bed.

Didn't Ben and JoJo have that exact date already?  Waterfall, smooching, sitting on a grimy rock without a towel...  Both of them likely came down with bacterial infections after that chat.  At least JoJo picked a much more practical bathing suit this time.  Ben had such a heavy heart through both of those dates and wasn't able to relax at all.  JoJo must have had horrible thoughts running through her mind as to what Ben was thinking.  When she asked Ben to open up to her, he told her "It's exactly what you probably think".  Imagine if something is as bad and horrific as you have in your head?!

Ben was obviously putting his foot in his mouth BIG time.  Now he's keeping quiet and not saying anything?!  Last week he was confessing his love to any pretty girl that walked by and now he wants to worry about breaking hearts?!

Ben ended up completely friendzoning JoJo.  I feel bad for her because there is no way I would want any guy to see me crying on a bathroom floor unless I was going to marry them.  Some things are sacred and only for your girlfriends to see.  If a man can make you feel better when you're blubbering with your forehead on a public toilet seat and then speak to you again, marry him.  Trust me.







I hesitate to say that any massive diamond ring is ugly but Ben picked the worrrrrst one.  I'm a bit of a purist when it comes to jewelry.  I love my princess cut solitaire and wouldn't trade it for another piece of bling.  The one he chose reminded me of a big college football ring.  Both Lauren and JoJo are so girly that I wish he had something more dainty and pretty than big and in your face.  All of that being said, Neil Lane seems like a really stand up guy!





The moments leading up to the first helicopter are excruciatingly thrilling to watch.  I worry about Chris Harrison's hearing as he doesn't appear to have any protection for his ears and those helicopters come close!  I could not look away from the television and, although I was so positive Lauren would be "the one", there was a moment when I believed that JoJo could pull through.






As JoJo approached, I knew from the look in his eye that he was about to let her go.  After he gave his speech, I honestly wish, on JoJo's behalf, that a trap door opened up below her and just made her disappear.  #devastation  I can't imagine standing there across from the man you are in love with and hear the dreaded "...but...".  She really kept it together and, although clearly devastated, she made an incredibly graceful, though tearful, exit.  Look at her though- she looked stun-ning!




I LOVE BEN FOR CALLING LAUREN'S DAD!  *squealllllllll* I can't quit him.  I really don't have the capacity to think of him in a negative light.  Do I agree with every decision he's made?  No.  Do I love him and think he's the least douchey Bachelor yet?  Absolutely!    Lauren is the best match for Ben and I happen to have high hopes for their relationship.  They are more on the same page as far as career, lifestyle and family than most Bachelor/ette couples we've seen.  They both seem pretty normal other than the spotlight that will follow them around for a bit.  As long as they agree to a few Instagram sponsorships and have a cute dog, they will live happily ever after just like Sean and Catherine.




So that's it!  Season is over,  Lauren and Ben will get married and stay that way forever and JoJo is The Bachelorette!  Everyone wins.  Will you be watching JoJo find love in the Fall?  What are your thoughts on Ben's final pick?  Thanks for following along and keep your eye out for non-Bachelor posts between now and JoJo's season!

Why couldn't you just keep your mouth shut, Ben?! A recap of the Final Three

I could barely get out of bed today due to the emotional hangover caused by last night's episode of The Bachelor.  I was also hoping I would have a snow day from work but it was mostly due to Ben's outrageous and utterly reckless behaviour.

 

The episode after hometowns is always do or die for the final three ladies.  They've proven that their families aren't crazy (or in the case of this season, their families don't include two small children) and Ben is at least remotely interested in shacking up with each one in the Fantasy Suite.

Caila was the lucky winner of the first date with Ben.  That makes her the least at risk for getting an STI as well as the one Ben will remember least after three straight nights of drinking wine and doin' it.  

Caila is too much.  First of all- she has an impossibly gorgeous body, flawless teeth and are-you-joking-me hair.  Don't you hate that?!  She confuses me.  I can't figure out if she's really sweet and charming or if she's trying too hard.  No one can be that smiley and articulate all the time.  It worried me when she didn't feel comfortable expressing her insecurities to Ben as they floated down a river, likely filled with snakes, on a bamboo raft.  She's all oogley googley when it comes to talking about the mushy stuff but she wasn't able to make herself vulnerable at all to tell Ben she was feeling insecure.

I can understand how Caila's intensity was attractive to Ben.  She makes crazy eye contact and is such a passionate and deep person.  I'm just not convinced Caila can turn it off.  Can she throw on a pair of sweats and watch mindless television?  Can she open up and really work through stressful or tough situations?

The best thing about this season is that, when it comes to the final three women, there aren't any villains.  Ben legitimately narrowed it down to three really nice girls who are there for all the right reasons.  They all seem quite normal (despite their insane beauty) and haven't (yet) done anything to get them fired from their jobs, smeared on social media or disowned by their families.  

Lauren B. (can we call her just "Lauren" now?) has been my favorite since early on.  I can't find anything wrong with her except for occasional Caribbean hair frizz.  She's a really seemingly normal person.  She isn't "too" anything.  She's super pretty but not disgustingly pretty, nice but not nicey nicey and just an overall stable girl.  Wait...  not as in a girl who works with horses...  just a girl who has her sh!t together, you know?   

I'm going to let you in on a little secret...  I almost cried about five times when Ben and Lauren were helping the baby sea turtles get to the ocean.  That date was amazing!  It's another great example of Lauren not caring that much about the glitz and glam.  All of Lauren's dates with Ben have been about compassion and care for others.   Ok... so that time they were in a hot tub in the middle of no where won't win them any humanitarian awards but so much of their time together is about sharing these really tender experiences and giving back.  

The world stopped spinning for me when Ben told Lauren he was in love with her.  Is that an exaggeration?  No.  (yes...)  My jaw was on the floor.  If you are The Bachelor, and you tell a girl you're in love with her, the season is over.  No need for a helicopter ride or impractical gown and shoe combination.  Just call Neil Lane, tell him to get over to the resort with his suitcase full of diamonds and pop one on that finger.  Easy peasey lemon squeezey.  But no no no...  we can't possibly make things that straight forward...  Ben had to also be in love with JoJo.

I like JoJo.  I just don't like JoJo as much as I like Lauren.  JoJo is prime Bachelorette material where Lauren is a better match for Ben.  She doesn't seem as grounded and confident as Lauren.  Her past relationships sound horrendous and maybe she needs this as part of her growing process... and as grooming to be the next Bachelorette!

I love Jamaica.  It's one of my favorite places to go.  In fact, last time I was in Jamaica, I myself was proposed to.  It really is a great place to be in love.  I always see brochures for excursions to YS Falls and I've never been interested.  Now I'm totally kicking myself.  That place looks unreal!  JoJo obviously did not anticipate actually having to get in the water as her "bathing suit" was the least practical piece of "clothing" I have ever seen.  Come on now...  

Ben did not waste any time blubbering that he loves JoJo and I almost punched him right through the TV.  What are you doooooing!?

Facepalm...

Just such an incredibly poor decision on his part.  He knows there is a microphone and camera following him around right?  He knows that every other Bachelor/ette in Bachelor/ette history has been discouraged from every declaring love right?!  I wonder why that is, BEN.  You know this is aired to millions of people including the two girls you just proclaimed your love to right, BEN?!

The hardest part in all of this is that I believe him.  I do!  I really think he loves both of them and that Ben, Lauren (obviously the first wife) and JoJo (the second wife that gains a ton of weight by season three)  are going to premiere a TLC polygamy spin off this summer.  How is Ben going to get himself out of this mess?  Never mind that he has to pick one girl to propose to- he also has to deal with the aftermath of all of this over the next couple of weeks on Women Tell All and After the Final Rose.  Hopefully Juan Pablo shows up to give him some advice.

Luckily, Ben knew that he was not in love with Caila so he sent her home.  This was the only point in the season where we saw Caila without a smile on her face which gives me hope that she is not a robot and that she does feel emotions like hurt and sadness... at least that one time.  

I don't know what this dude is going to do at the finale.  The previews show Ben whipping out his cell phone (why would he even need a phone in his suit pocket during a proposal on television!?), crying, sitting on the ground...  It could be (say it with me now) the most dramatic Bachelor finale yet.  

 

  

There's no town like Hometowns!!

Hometown visits are the "do or die" of The Bachelor/ette.  We have seen the unthinkable happen inside contestants' homes.  We all know from our own dating experiences that going to meet Mom and Dad or introducing your bf/gf to your family is so so stressful.  Imagine involving a production crew with lights, cameras and microphones?  My family would not be down and I can't imagine the days of planning that go into setting up these hometown visits.

Amanda definitely had the most to gain or lose out of her hometown visit.  Unfortunately, she lost half of her top right before filming.  Least practical shirt ever.  I don't even understand the mechanics behind it.  How does it stay up?  Apparently not very well as she was pulling on it the entire time.

Ben finally got to meet Amanda's little girls and they are adorbs (although they caught their mother's impractical outfit gene because those sandals were not beach appropriate).  He didn't seem freaked out right off the bat. Ben is obviously really comfortable around kids and he really honors that they're a huge part of Amanda. He knows that he will have to be the one to change and adapt to their lives if he is to continue a relationship with her.  I'm pretty sure he was crying when Amanda ran up the beach to greet them.  It could have been sand in his eye or allergies but I'm fairly certain they were real tears.

I don't think Amanda will be at the end of this but it's an important process for her to go through. It's opening her eyes to the importance of dating and finding a loving adult to connect with.

Ben is so incredible at talking. That's potentially a ridiculous thing to say but he is so confident and open.  He never stumbles on his words or sounds like he's b-s'ing.  Amanda's parents obviously had some serious concerns about Ben coming into the lives of these two little ones but Ben was really honest and didn't just tell them what they wanted to hear.

Knowing what Ben knows already about the limelight and the aftermath of being on a show like The Bachelor, he must consider how Amanda would be able to deal and cope with that.  Sometimes I look back on Emily Maynard being a contestant and then The Bachelorette and wonder how she juggled being a single mom with being such a public figure.  Amanda is also so so so young and has so much going on that I don't think she even wants to put herself through all of this.

Ben then traveled to Portland OR to visit Lauren and her family. That place seems completely up Ben's alley. Heck- Portland is completely up my alley!  They seem the most relaxed and normal together out of all the couples. They just look at each other and their eyes sparkle and talk.  He likes her so so so much.  He's crying again just thinking about his love for her.

Even Lauren's family is pretty low on the crazy family scale. I liked how protective but open her sister and dad were. They expressed their concerns but also trusted that Lauren really is falling in love and that she wants this.
The worst thing that happened was her dad calling her "LoLo".  That's lamelame.

Lauren is the most ready for all of this.  Her family is supportive, she has it together but not in a "I have to leave my 6-figure career for you and move to a remote farm where no one has all of their teeth way.  She just likes him.  And he likes her.  And what more can you want in a relationship!?

As time goes on, I am liking Caila less and less.  She has this weird ability to be too cutesy but also really intense. Every conversation is really deep and filled with big words but also a bit innocent and immature.

Her date with Ben pretty much showcased exactly that.  I guess it's cool that your dad owns a toy factory but we never see a grown up or really serious side of Caila.  Everything seems to be butterflies and rainbows and Ben isn't looking for that.  Even though he is only 27, he has maturity and grounded qualities that are lacking in Caila.

It freaks me out when adults call their parents Mommy and Daddy.  Caila's Daddy also freaks me out.  I see where Caila gets her intense eye contact and inappropriately large vocabulary.  You know when people use big words and lengthy analogies all the time just because they can?  Or when you go to someone's house for dinner and the hosts try to engage you in really detailed conversation about Syrian politics?

Long story short, despite Ben being really attracted to Caila, he has so much more real chemistry with the other girls.  There is so much more interest and variety in the personalities of Amanda, Lauren and JoJo.  Speaking of JoJo...

I watch a lot of reality TV.  I mean a.... lot.  I've watched horrendous shows that I am not proud of.  I like to think The Bachelor is one of the "top tier" programs.  It's in its twentieth season, it has millions of viewers, etc.  That whole flowers-and-letter-from-JoJo's-ex was too much.  What was the point of all of that?!  She seemed legit pissed and couldn't believe that was happening.  I would like to think that, if I was on a show like The Bachelor, every guy I've ever batted an eyelash at would be super jealous and want me for themselves but don't put it on air!  What a lamesauce move by production.  I hated that.

JoJo's brothers were obviously taking whiskey shots before filming began.  They were so over the top when JoJo came in. If you don't know the background behind her brother Ben, check out this site immediately- http://www.bustle.com/articles/144886-videos-of-jojos-brother-ben-patton-on-ready-for-love-make-him-look-like-a-hypocrite.  What a doucher.

Overprotective older brothers make me so mad.  They put Ben in such an uncomfortable position and it's the first time that we see him shut down.  He was really flat and vague when talking to them. All of that being said, I think the brothers are right when they tell JoJo that Ben doesn't seem as invested as she is. How amazing was their mom when she was just drinking champ straight out of the bottle while the brothers were ranting in the kitchen?!

Being sent home immediately after hometowns is the ultimate diss. I would absolutely disown my family if a guy dumped me the night after meeting them.  That being said, Amanda can't possibly be too crushed about Ben sending her home.  She has an entire family waiting for her and she knew all along that Ben might not be into the whole "come be a stepdad!" life.

My prediction is that JoJo and Lauren will be final two.  Other than Caila's perfect physical appearance, she won't be able to stand out against them.  I'm so looking forward to seeing how this season will play out!!

Fraying Lace- Week 3 Bachelor recap

It's that point in the season where you watch the Bachelor and, within the first three minutes, you find yourself wondering, "Wait...  who's that?" at least three times.  The producers have been spending 80% of their time on 20% of the girls and now, since numbers are dwindling already, one starts to notice people like Jennifer, Shushana and Rachel.  Who?  Exactly.

Jennifer

Shushanna

Rachel

Lauren B. is adorbs and it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone that she scored the episode's first 1-on-1 date.  Despite being a flight attendant, she seemed out of her element flying in a propeller plane. She probably felt insecure without her drink cart and an emergency escape plan.  How do you get out of one of those planes if it's going down?

Although Lauren was nervous, it was refreshing to see a date that involved flying and heights where the girl doesn't happen to be deathly afraid of both of those things. The pilot conveniently flew directly over the Bachelor mansion while all of the girls happened to be outside.  That's just cruel.

Finally the plane landed in an incredibly remote location that, conveniently enough, had a working hot tub. Where is the plug and water source for said hot tub?  Who was the poor bloke that had to lug that thing out, fill it up, then come back out to empty it and cart it away?!

Ben and Lauren were really comfortable and sweet together.  The main issue I had was trying to figure out how her hair was so gorgeous while being in the hot tub?  I would look way worse than this coming out of more than 10 mins in a hot tub:

A quiet dinner allowed Ben to get to know about Lauren's family and values.  He was so sweaty during their chat. Give this dude a t-shirt!  Chris Harrison- where were you on that one?  Lauren told Ben that she's really picky when it comes to guys because she's looking for someone as kind and caring as her dad.  If Lauren gets a home town, I bet her father will be the one cleaning his gun in the garage when they arrive.  Luckily, if things don't work out for Lauren B, she could join the band that was serenading them at the end of the night (Lucy Angel) since they all looked exactly like she will in 30 years.





The group date was a soccer competition where the girls were put on two teams and coached by players from Team USA.  Can I just go back to something for one second...  Who is Rachel??  Other than her "23, Unemployed" description, we know nothing about this girl.  She may not have played soccer before but she's sure watched enough. She faked a hamstring injury like a real pro!  Emily (the twin) was really impressive with her goal tending.  She comes across as really dainty but she was taking some serious hits!  At the end of the date, the losing team had to hobble back to the mansion while the winners rinsed off and got to enjoy an after party with Ben.

Jami was a real weiney this week.  I've been uncomfortable with her since the beginning when, during her first encounter with Ben, she revealed she knows Kaitlin and she's told her all about him.  Then, this week, she pulled Olivia aside and ratted out the girls for talking about how hideous Olivia's toes are.  By the way- why are the girls talking about how hideous Olivia's toes are?

Amber finally decided that tonight was the night to make her move and try to establish a connection with Ben.  They were having a completely boring surface conversation then they just started kissing. It was surprising because I don't sense a spark but she snatched up the group date rose so she must have left some sort of positive impression.

The second 1-on-1 date went to Jubilee.  As time goes on, I really feel for the girl.  She's really stepped out of her comfort zone.  Although Jubilee comes across as a total bad@$$, she is actually fragile, sensitive and has a tragic past.  She uses the tough girl to cover up her awkwardness and insecurities. Once she got away from the other girls, she was much more herself.

"This date shows me what just a normal day would be like". A day taking a helicopter to an exclusive spa?  Oh yeah- get used to that.  It's sad that Jubilee hasn't found someone that she can completely be herself around.  She has one of the most gut-wrenching stories I've heard on The Bachelor.  She was adopted from Haiti after her entire family died in an accident.  Ben was so genuinely kind to her.  He pushed Jubilee to open up more but, by that point, he had developed her trust.  I know that Jubilee won't be top three and I worry about her heart being even more broken.  I literally got butterflies when he kissed her hand before asking her to accept the rose.

At the end of the night, Ben entered the cocktail party and let the ladies know that two close family friends had died in a plane crash.  He told them he was down and just needed their care and support throughout the night.  Olivia immediately pulled him aside and cried about how she hates her legs...  No guy on Earth wants to hear a girl complain about her appearance on the best of days.  She's the worst.

Good on Lace for leaving the show - for real. That girl was in way over her head and knew that she and Ben weren't establishing a close connection.  I agree that she needs to work on herself but disagree with her quoting her own tattoo.  "You can't love someone else until you truly love yourself."  That must be a really long tattoo...  I bet production passed her a clipboard on her way out with her contract for Bachelor in Paradise.

Who is Rachel??

Thaaaaaaaank you, Ben, for not giving Jami a rose.  She ended the rose ceremony saying she's learned to never trust humans and that she was off to adopt a bunch of cats.

Bachelor on Ice(cube)

My apologies for being a few days behind on posting this Bachelor blog but I started watching "Making a Murderer" and... well...  need I say more?

My prediction going into this week was that Amanda (the mom) would get the one-on-one date or at least a group date rose.  I was torn between believing that Lace is actually a crazy person or perhaps she just got caught up in the excitement (and wine) of the first night.  Either way, Ben didn't seem too into her and I thought we'd see a tearful, mascara-running goodbye from Lace at the end of week two.

Let me get this straight...  Ben's staying at the Four Seasons??  Did ABC's lease run out on his mansion next door to the girls?  Maybe that was actually Chris Harrison's family home and the Bachelors were bunking with him throughout the season.  Did Chris lose it in the divorce?  Speaking of...  does anyone know if Chris Harrison is dating?

Ben was so excited to go back to high school for the group date.  He talked about how it was the best time of his life and what great memories he has there.  I can guarantee you that at least 95% of the women on that date had horrible experiences in high school.  Being a teenager is rough and I don't know many people who think back to their time as a 15-18 year old and remember it as a high point.  The mini competitions between the girls were fun and probably let Ben see who kept their cool, who got along with one another, etc.  Mandi was the overall winner of the competition but there didn't seem to be much of a prize except for a 300m ride in a convertible...

I'm starting to like Jubilee a lot more.  In her initial video, she came across very dominant but, although definitely one strong gal, she started to show a more fun and light side during the group date.

**Note:  This is not the soft, light Jubilee




Lace...  Lace, Lace, Lace...  any girl that says "I'm not crazy" over and over again and has to go out of her way to try and prove how not-crazy she is, is crazy!!  She kept talking about how her behavior on the first night wasn't really her and she doesn't want Ben to see that side of her again.  I'm sure she's not drunk and coo-coo most of the time but it's in there and once it's been unleashed, it's hard to forget and it's bound to reappear.  If Lace is feeling insecure or out of her comfort zone, she should just say that.  I'm sure Ben would be able to relate and appreciate her openness.  Ben continued to reassure her that he understands and all is well but she is really hung up on eye contact and pretty much lectures Ben when she doesn't get the attention she wants from him.  Lace is obviously really overwhelmed and is not okay in this environment. Everyone has insecurities but if the foundation isn't there, it's not going to develop competing for a man on TV.

Although I'm not a fan of bringing back past contestants, Becca is sweet as punch and seems a lot more fun and flirty with Ben than she was with Chris.  Her comfort level around the camera/lights is likely much higher than most of the girls so she's able to maximize her time with Ben and really focus on building their relationship.





"Don't kiss and tell" is a rule for a reason, ladies.  If "your" man is dating 20 other girls and he kisses you, he's probably kissing at least 10 of your housemates.  If you've run off to make out with Ben in his hotel room, none of the other girls want to hear about it.  I would find it very difficult to balance friendships within the house knowing that everyone is ultimately trying to marry the same person.  Could you really come home from a one-on-one date and dish all the deets to your newest gal pals?  Probably not.  Being a Bachelor social media stalker, I see evidence of lots of strong friendships built between the past contestants but I wonder how they put the rivalries aside.

Jojo received the group date rose.  She's quite sweet and reminds me of a not so cutesy Tenley from Jake's season.  Oh man- remember how douchey Jake and Vienna were?  So happy...  so in love.






Last week, I let you in on my disdain for twin twists and when former Bachelor contestants are brought back for "on more shot at love".  This week, I was reminded of something I hate even more than those two things- movie/TV show promos!!  If I had a one-on-one date and found out someone would be following us around making jokes the whole time, I'd leave.  None of those white girls even know who Ice Cube is. Wait...  was that Ice Cube or Ice T??  See- my point exactly.  At least he and Kevin Hart were there were nice to poor Caila. Last year, Kimmel was such a prick during Kaitlin's date with Chris.

Ben is so refreshing to watch (and listen to) after Chris' season of mumbles, stammers and not being able to communicate with women at all. Caila is a great listener and seemed to really hear Ben and bring out a vulnerable side in him during dinner.  Amos Lee showed up to serenade the couple and he is so great!  How awkward for him though.  It would be so weird standing on a stage with a full production/camera/light/sound crew just waiting for them to walk in...

The Love Lab group date was just bizarre. Ben wanted to use science to measure attraction and chemistry which involved sniffing each girl while blindfolded after they'd been on the treadmill.  Poor Sam. No one wants a guy saying they smell "sour".  Could he have just lied and said she smelled nice?  I'm surprised the whole things wasn't a promo for stress sweat deodorant.





Amanda decided the time was right to tell Ben about her daughters.  "Kids don't scare me. It's not something I've done before but they don't scare me."  So sweet!!  I thought I was going to die when, before the rose ceremony, Ben had a crafting station set up to make barrettes for the girls.  He.is.so.cute.

The whole Olivia shtick is going to wear off soon. Ben will see through it soon.  She's just...  a lot.  She's obnoxious and not really that nice or interesting.  There is obviously physical chemistry (as the Love Lab proved) but Ben's not connecting with her like he is with some of the other girls.  And that mouth...


Question- Did L.B. chose her nickname or was it automatically assigned to her when "Lauren B." was taken?  It doesn't really matter because she chose to leave this week but I am curious...

I'm worried about the girls who are on the quieter side this season.  The majority of the girls seem really sweet and kind.  If Ben's "type" is Kaitlin from the Bachelorette, the women with the louder, more outgoing personalities certainly have an advantage.  I hope he gets to spend more quality time with girls like Amanda, Lauren H,, Lauren B. and Leah.

What are your thoughts and predictions??  Comment below or tweet @midtowndiaries.