For anyone who did not read the title of this post and immediately have "Backstreet's Back" in their head, shame on you.
I decided to hold off on recapping the new season of The Bachelorette until after the second episode. Although incredibly entertaining and the ultimate test of what a judgey B you actually are (I'm ranking pretty high on the Judgey B scale), the premier really doesn't mean too much. I tend to enjoy the first few episodes of The Bachelor much more than The Bachelorette as a room full of 20+ guys is just a bro show. All of them are on guard and pointing out the weaknesses in each other. We all know that those chirps are covering up their own insecurities,
It seems like, with each season, the group dates get more elaborate and competitive. When, before the group date, there was a limo on fire in the driveway, I really thought that The Rock was going to jump out and plug his new movie where he is a single dad/firefighter and his kids get kidnapped by an arsonist and the only way to save them is to start a fire in a remote African village to kill the kidnapper's nemesis. Luckily, it was just a plain old firefighting challenge without any cameos or movie promotions.
Poor Wells. He really did give the competition his all but the dude is 120 lbs or less. Despite his piddly little muscles, I'm actually starting to think that Wells is kind of hot... Not convinced? Feast your eyes on this:
Luckily, the fire chief noticed that Wells was looking a bit pale and about one axe swing away from black out status. He got pulled from the competition to cool down and be made fun of by every man, woman and child in America. It all paid off though and he pretty much got a one-on-one date as JoJo went to check on him. He could have been a big baby about it but he brushed it off as nothing and definitely took advantage of the time he had.
Can we take a moment to acknowledge that Grant IS a firefighter!! There was a little piece of me that wanted someone else to win but it would have been the absolute annihilation of his reputation in the firehouse. I can't decide how I feel about Grant. Under a certain light, he's a bit exotic and mysterious but then sometimes my creep meter starts to climb.
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| (not Luke... but I can see him cracking and Caseying the whole season) |
Luke makes me nervous because he seems very sensitive and isn't really able to handle the emotional journey that comes with 20+ guys dating your girlfriend. Hopefully he doesn't completely lose it... I can see him falling through the cracks and going unnoticed compared to all of the big personalities and confident guys around him,
JoJo is taking the Chris Soules approach to being The Bachelor/ette which means making out with eeeeeeeveryone. Does she grab a piece of gum or spray in between guys? They must all have awful booze breath which is almost as bad as popcorn breath.
Can someone please buy me a ticket to Katy, TX so I can become best friends with James T.? Love love love him. I want to hang out with him every weekend. His songwriting and general spirit is so fun. Chad can poopoo however much he wants but when he was leading the guys in a songwriting and choreography session, I almost died. Uggg... such a nice guy. My concern for James is that he is going to get friendzoned so hard which is what I suspect has prevented him from finding love in the past. I've known a few guys who are the most lovely and deserving sweethearts ever but they can just never land the ladies. So heartbreaking to watch but I know this show will James paaaaaa-lenty of action afterwards. As an early favorite for being The Bachelor, James would bring a set of cool, quirky girls. It could be the dorkiest season yet. #JamesTforBachelor
JoJo's choice of Derrick for the one-on-one date was unexpected but.... interesting. Don't you find he looks a bit like John Krasinski with a bigger nose? A little bit, right?!
I'm glad that JoJo listened to the advice of the former Bachelorettes and didn't pick one of the guys she knows she likes. It is a waste of everyone's time to only date the people you hit it off with right away (ie: Leah from last season- yuck). JoJo needs to start ruling people out ASAP and picking people like Derrick may not make for thrilling Monday night television but it keeps the "process" moving along.
I love the idea of a choose-your-own adventure date. I'm the most indecisive person in the world and also have a terrible reluctance to take risks so I'd break down crying after the 2nd question sign along the highway. They seemed to have fun though. JoJo and Derrick definitely connected but he will eventually get over shadowed by the guys with more personality.
Would you forgive me of I completely glossed over talking about Chad?! I can't even... He's such a friggin' grease ball. My nightmares have nightmares about him. What an utter weeny. He keeps talking about how he's being so "real" and is under the impression that, just because the other guys are having fun and like each other, that they are being fake. He's not even being that "real" because he has a massive wall up and hasn't been able to be open to JoJo or to anyone else. Chad is completely delusional about how great he is. If, in fact, he's being honest and open and real, that's great because JoJo will be able to make her decision so much faster.
The second group date had a really fun group of guys (except for Chad). I like the dates that have a competitive nature but none of the men are put at an advantage by having a particular skill set. The guys were able to show their lighter silly sides.
I'm so glad that James won the challenge so that we could all hear the sweet things that just flow out of his mouth. As if he actually said "A smile is the only thing you can see on the outside that comes from the inside" during a regular conversation. James- be my friend!!! Please!! JoJo definitely wants to get to know him better and, obviously!, he was awarded with the date rose.
The rose ceremony was super tense. I think I even heard scary music being played at one point... When Chase set up a mini Colorado-theme snow date for JoJo, I thought I would melt. He is inching his way up my serious potential list. He's very good looking when his face is on an angle.
I feel the most sad for the "Bachelor Super Fan". I legit don't know his name but he was brave enough to say what our boyfriends and husbands don't- that they know everything about this show even though they "don't watch it". How IS that!?
With all the Chad drama, online ex-girlfriend controversy about whatever Aaron Rodger's brother's name is (look it up- it's juicy!), and the mystery of how/why Evan styles his hair like that, it should be a great season! I'd love to hear your thoughts and predictions. Comment below or find my Midtown Diaries page on Facebook.
