I know... take a moment..
Just take a deep breath...
Now that you've calmed down, just let me explain. I've always thought myself to be a bit too high-strung. I react quickly and emotionally, I have a hard time letting things go and I'm tend to back away from tough situations instead of taking them head on. So what do we do when we want to change our behaviours? We look at people we would want to be more like and see what they are doing different. One thing that kept coming up again and again as a common factor was... yoga.
Perfect! Balance, flow, patience, dedication, gratitude, inner healing... Confession time... (Lindsey Jarrett- cover your eyes)... I can't do it. I've tried a few different instructors, at home practice, with music, without music, wearing a sweater, wearing a t-shirt, inside, outside... I just can't do it.
I feel like a phoney when I walk into the studio in my lululemon pants (why do they cost so much?!) and long sleeve shirt with the thumb holes. The lady next to me is breathing too loud and ... oh god... I think my instructor just started speaking in tongues... Does it feel good afterwards? Yes. Is it good for me? No doubt. But do I need to spend an hour doing something I don't want to do just incase I, one day, become enlightened and more connected to myself and the world?
I just don't think I'm "there". I'm not at an open, spiritual place in my life and (I think) that's ok. But I struggle to know if that's a sign I should keep working through or go back to my Wednesday morning spin classes where my instructor makes us sing the chorus to Fat Bottom Girls at the top of our lungs while climbing a 20 min hill. Now that is my idea of a good work out.
Look- I am in no way dissing yoga. I know it does incredible things for people and I have the deepest respect and admiration for all of my yogi friends. But is it normal to start out feeling so strongly against it? Should I keep persevering through or move on to something that is just more "me"?
Please leave your comments (and suggestions!) or join the conversation @darbyvt #yogablues
2 comments:
Plus that Downward Dog situation that you always see in the movies - with the teacher standing directly behind the student stretching out her hips - doesn't just happen in the movies. I am soooo not comfortable being in that position with someone that I'm not married to...lol. It's so weird!
I started yoga the day my hip seized getting out of the car. It was a sad day when I realized I was getting old (but not old yet!) I don't "get it" either, but I like the stretch and so I keep doing it in the comfort of my own home, with the expensive pants.
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